Wednesday, October 12, 2005

The Blues Brothers versus President Bush

I lied. I'm going to compare The Blues Brothers to President Bush.
  • They're both well dressed. Slap a little flag lapel pin on a Blues Brother and add shades to President Bush, and they're basically the same. I didn't like looking at President Bush's eyes anyway.
  • I think it's safe to say that President Bush also hates Illinois Nazis.
  • Tell me this doesn't sound like President Bush:
    Jake: No I didn't. Honest... I ran out of gas. I, I had a flat tire. I didn't have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn't come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts. IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD.
  • One big advantage the Blues Brothers would have over President Bush is their total imperviousness to assassination attempts. The Secret Service could turn their attention to counterfeiters.
  • The Blues Brothers have a similarly casual attitude toward the truth:
    Elwood: What was I gonna do? Take away your only hope? Take away the very thing that kept you going in there? I took the liberty of bullshitting you.
  • I suspect they have similar attitudes about fiscal responsibility, but I'd like to think The Blues Brothers wouldn't blow our tax dollars quite the way President Bush has.
I'd work in a joke here about the approval of the use of unnecessary force, but it wouldn't be funny.

I'd favor The Blues Brothers, given President Bush's record so far. Those two could make an excellent sixteen-year dynasty. Just think of the press conferences!
Post a Comment